I started following the works of one of my friends 4 years ago. My life was dark and so was his art. His art has shifted from watercolor and screamo music to graphic novels and now he aims to be the best graphic novelist in all of Japan. On the journey of following someone's art you learn a lot about a person. A few days ago he posted this:
I am working so damn hard to become a better artist. Every day, for many many hours I am drawing manga and I don't stop until I just fall asleep overtired on my desk...I pursue the dream to become one of the best manga-ka in Japan.
It is a big pressure, and even very good artists collapse...and I have been pushed into my limits which caused me a lot of depressions.
But now I feel that I am getting improved with each stroke I draw, and all the hard and exhausting work is worth it. I have choosen this kind of lifestyle over the 'every-day-comforts' - because I am aware, that if I can not fulfill my dreams, my life is worthless.
My heart broke for him as I read the last sentence. He is slaving over a life that is slowly killing him. I can see this in his art, this pain and struggle to be the best. All I can do is hope that my friend finds joy elsewhere in life or achieves his dream.
But it makes me wonder what my art shows? My art that I put up has shifted from a Japanese/Anime look and a dark look to more springy. Like spring has sprung in my life. I don't get as many "views" or "favorites" but I get joy out of my art which is new and fun. But then I look at the rest of my life and wonder is there anything I'm striving for that if I cannot fulfill I feel like my life is worthless?
The cover of my sketchbook.
